Happy now?

It's 3 in the morning...and here I am finding myself blogging. I suppose the reason why I'm blogging is because earlier I was on FB and saw a picture that reminded me of how cruel some people can be. I've totally tried to brush things off but seeing that picture and the names below it brought back the anger...ok maybe not anger but the feeling of bother in the pit of my stomach.

So, I finally found out why that friend was mad at me...and ok, I understand the whole initial reason for being mad but the whole cancelling on the trip thing was a little over reaction. I can't believe how my cancelling on a trip that was never booked (in terms of a flight) caused a chain reaction of this person's action and how it brought back to this person something so irrelevant. First of all, I gave plenty of notice to cancel the trip...almost 3 months notice. Secondly, I offered taking the trip the following week but I was told that they weren't able to take time off. Only I found out...actually...let me rephrase it...it was rubbed in my face and broadcasted to all those on MSN that they were going on a trip the week that they supposedly couldn't take time off! (And I'm the one who started blogging for all to see...and that's why you blocked me?) Thirdly, I never would have told any of our mutual friends not to invite you anywhere (but you did...and you included in there a totally innocent person who has nothing to do with our fight)

So all those times knowing that you were mad at me...I still made attempts at contacting you via MSN...and you chose to ignore them. Mutual friends invited you to things and you always had an excuse to not come because you couldn't out right say you were mad at me. After all the attempts I made to still be your friend and talk to you...I finally gave up. I deleted and blocked you on MSN when I soon discovered you had blocked me. And now you're saying that you needed time and you made an attempt to contact me. When? When someone passes away? Is that what it takes to finally put our differences aside...a person's life? I still wanted to be your friend when there were people telling me that I shouldn't even care about you anymore. I still included you in the emails when our mutual friends were getting together because I knew that despite how much you hated me it was the right thing to do. Oh and by the way, thanks for not including me in sending off a gift to a friend's baby.

So there, it's finally out in the open...you've finally heard my side. And it sucks that it has to be this way...but I don't know how else to tell you this. You really hurt me. Can we still be friends? I don't know. Will I ever be able to face you and talk to you? I don't know. I'll make things easier for you and for our mutual friends who are stuck in the middle of things. I won't show up to anything. I'm sure they've already heard your side...and I'm sure they have their reservations about me thanks to you. I'd rather not be put at odds or feel like I don't belong so it's best that I keep my distance. I don't want to have to pretend that I'm happy being around. I'm sure you're happy now that I'm out of the picture.